The Bananaverse

I’m about to go to bed, but I have some stuff to get out of my head:

I really want to be writing things. Not like, “here’s what I did today” things, but stories and things that can make me a writer. It would be cool if I could do that. I want to be something. Not just have a job, but have something that I am. I don’t think I have anything like that now and it sucks. I feel like I’m at such loose ends lately, and I can’t quite figure out why.

Lost in Translation is a really good movie. Tapeheads is one of the funniest films I’ve seen in so long, and it’s even still funny. I adore this film. How Soon Is Never is a really awesome good book. I’ve been absorbing media lately and not really recording my thoughts about it. I need to.

We watched Pirates Of The Caribbean the other night too…well, I watched it again, and The Scoot saw it for the first time. It makes me want to run out and sign up for fencing classes or something. !! Just erryaaaaarrrrreeeeeeegyreoijvoja;wjo4kjksdfnsvlksdjskjedkraydskjfieyeah!!!

Anyway.

I need to do some serious drinking and soon! Just tomorrow and then two days off. I hope it goes ok. I dont’ think I have a lot to do recently so maybe I can devote my time to more creative pursuits.

I’m still back at the swordfighting. Or maybe some sort of martial art. Mmmmm.

Oh!

And I recently got a new phone, the Motorola T730. I adore it. It’s cool and neat and my only issue is that I don’t have a sticker for the screen to keep my earrings from wearing grooves in it. So I’mma hafta work on that. hmmmm. All flip phone screen preservation hacks are appreciated.

I’m feeling like the gadgerati lately-new laptop, new palm, new phone…Not to mention the new car! (it still makes me happy). EEEE! The suck is that I don’t get any new anything for like EVER since I got it all at once.

Turns out the Js will be like, half an hour from my brother when they move out of the People’s Republic Of Utah. It might be cool. I think that will depend on who you ask.

Apparently it’s like the Disneyland of Mexican Restaurants…which has something to do with South Park but I don’t know what since I wasn’t watching the ad.

I think tomorrow night I shall forsake that stupid friends rerun and watch a tape of the sopranos instead. There aren’t words for how much I need a TiVo. Seriouslah. TiVo and a good cable subscription. mmmmm.

Why is the dell laptop on TV using what appears to be a standard desktop in OSX? I think I’m too tired. me go sreepy now.

So!

I just put on my nighttime clothes (not jammies, since they aren’t jammies in the traditional sense of the word. they are clothes I wear to bed.)

I took off a Mac shirt and a pair of jeans.

I put on a Mac shirt and a pair of sweats.

That’s geeky even by my (higher than most) standards.

Damn.

Julius gets a new front end tomorrow. I hope. It’s a field trip away from the office for an hour. It’ll do me good. I hope it isn’t raining so I can feel like I’m really away having fun. (:

If you haven’t yet, check out Fooled By April and Digital Droo at CD Baby. I like them both. I think I’m about to add another couple of CDs to my list, but we’ll see what happens. (:

Yay Rargirl! yay!!!! (I know I keep saying that, but I keep thinking it!)

(:

Yeah yeah, another list. You’ll take it and like it!

* As it would turn out, there are not one, not two, not even three, but FOUR (count them, FOUR) dimensions of lusty fuck. I know, we backed up the DVD and she said it again.

* Rargirl got a fat new jobby job. In IRVINE. This means that the days of the Js in the People’s Republic Of Utah are, in fact, now officially numbered.

* My tummy is making creepy “we’re in a big old house in a scary movie and something is making a creepy noise” noises. I’m starting to freak out about it just a little.

* I just did those biore strips on my chin and on my nose. I don’t think I got anything interesting on either one. God dammit.

* Something once prompted J.Ro to say “Translation: Don’t put my teeth in the freezer, BITCH!” and neither of us can figure out what in the hell it was.

* He also talked to me once about his Cherry Coke Titties ™.

* There goes my tummy again. ahhh!

* (chappelleshow)J.Ro got some bigass tit-tayyyys…(/chappelleshow)

* Additionally, the whole cramps/cranky/achy/stuff leaving my body package is really not cool. I think it’s just that there are a lot of planets aligned against me at the moment. grrr.

* Jumpin Jesus on a pogo stick! I didn’t even eat anything today!!

* Radioio is the bestest internet station evar. I would date it if I could. Seriously. Check it.

* You know what else rules? Accents. I sound so plain, and I got to talk to a Scotsman today and it was really cool. Sometimes I really hate my standard-issue parts. Not stuff I came with, but the parts that are just regular and kind of plain.

* I need to read more. I have a huge stack that isn’t getting smaller.

* PHP will be my beeyatch.

* Dude! What are you DOING in there?????

* How come I don’t belong to a gym yet?

* I really like my newfound mobility.

* I will be better about writing. I promise you, me…

* Change is in the air for a lot of folks I know. Positive Change, too. It’s sure nice for once.

* I still need to do something about certain things that really need to be resolved.

* I need a new userpic.

* I need a new digital camera. OK, I don’t have one, so A digital camera.

* I think Julius is a good name for my computer. I’ll see if it sticks.

* I really need to do some geek press work. There’s this new zine in town and I wrote for it! It was fun and I liked it and I’m going to do more. I’m off to brainstorm right now. Then bed. Later!

So Condoleeza Rice said “there is a long standing principle here that the sitting National Security Advisor does not testify”

OK.

When you can find me another sitting national security advisor who WATCHED A PLANE FLY INTO A BUILDING, I’ll be more than happy to honor that.

Sitcho ass down and take that oath and start talking, lady. And bring Cheney’s energy advisory meeting notes with you.

There’s that bit in the Matrix where The Oracle tells Neo that nobody can see past a choice that they can’t understand. That’s exactly it. I can disagree wtih you all day long, but at least if you back it up with something I can understand you and still disagree. Virtually everything out of this administration is something I cannot see past.

Back to work for me…

So last night The Scoot started dinner, and Frog was here. he gave me a melon popsicle.

WHILE DINNER WAS COOKING.

Fuck you, adulthood!

One of those things that you are always told not to do and I did.

I’m off to run with scissors now. Then I’ll eat a sandwich and only wait 20 minutes before I go swimming.

Tonight I have plans to heat the whole outdoors.

(:

due to things that I don’t think I can control or change, I want new employment. Please help me with this. If you know someone, or know someone who knows someone, let me know. Please email me or comment on this thread or call me or whatever. Seriously. I would like to hope that I can cash in some karma here and something good will come my way. Please know that this is your chance to help someone in need and therefore even up the score on that one time that one person totally helped you out. I don’t like to beg, but if that’s what this sounds like, then that is what it is. Thanks.

Dear World,

Can you find it in your heart to please send someone J.Ro’s way who is reasonably intelligent and non-hideous aesthetically who isn’t a total slut? He really needs someone to ride him like he’s the last chopper out of ‘Nam.

Thank you.

-Verso

PS: Please tell Three Doors Down they are not the boss of me. If I wanted to love them I wouldn’t wait till they were gone just because they said so. I love them when they’re gone because then I don’t have to hear them. Thanks!

I have to know someone who desperately needs at least one set of these.

Do you ever have moments when you wonder how there’s room in your body for all the stuff that comes out of it?

Yeah.

So I stopped on the way in today and got myself one o them thar expresso whatnots. Triple Almond Roca Mocha. I’m so tired. I hope it gets better soon. Yargh.

I guess we’ll see if it jump starts my day or if I end up trying to jank J.Ro and asking him about fruit salad.

I hope she didn’t use no doodoo espresso!

(yikes. sorry.)

Smacked them bible bangers down, doo dah, doo dah…
Made them wingnuts look like clowns, oh doo dah dayyy
Your lawsuit is crap,
Smack you around slap slap,
Let them queens get all hitched up, oh doo dah dayyy

Hot off the presses! A judge in town heard the Defense Of Marriage Coalition’s injunction trying to stop gay marriage and said that it was without merit because they didn’t do a good job of proving that there was irreparable harm being done by letting them get married. Yay!

It was nice. I’m glad.

Interestingly enough, Seattle has said that even though they are not allowed to actually marry people (thank you washington), they are going to recognize the unions. I think that’s a clever way to get around it. Yay for them!

What if gay people offered to swap the bible bangers? “OK, how about this…if you let us get married, we swear that we will wait until we’re married to have sex.”

I think it’s brilliant. Unfair and stupid, but I wonder if it would really make a difference. I mean, they can’t even get the breeders to go along with that little scheme. (:

(margaret cho reference-her mom says to her “Mommyyyy know aaaaarl about the gay!”)

Found this. Dug it. Enjoy:

Twelve Reasons why homosexual marriage shouldn’t be legal

1. Homosexuality is not natural, much like eyeglasses, polyester, and birth control.

2. Heterosexual marriages are valid becasue they produce children. Infertile couples and old people can’t legally get married because the world needs more children.

3. Obviously, gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

4. Straight marriage will be less meaningful if Gay marriage is allowed, since Britney Spears’ 55-hour just-for-fun marriage was meaningful.

5. Heterosexual marriage has been around a long time and hasn’t changed at all; women are property, blacks can’t marry whites, and divorce is illegal.

6. Gay marriage should be decided by people, not the courts, because the majority-elected legislatures, not courts, have historically protected the rights of the minorities.

7. Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire counrty. That’s why we have only one religion in America.

8. Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

9. Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

10. Children can never suceed without a male and a female role model at home. That’s why single parents are forbidden to raise children.

11. Gay marriage will change the foundation of society. Heterosexual marriage has been around for a long time, and we could never adapt to new social norms because we haven’t adapted to things like cars or longer lifespans.

12. Civil unions, providing most of the same benefits as marriage with a different name are better, because a “seperate but equal” institution is always constitutional. Seperate schools for African-Americans worked just as well as seperate marriages for gays and lesbians will.

Dear Homosexuals,

Hello. You are quite the newsworthy bunch lately! What with all the marriages going on these days…especially here in town, where the Multnomah County Courthouse started issuing same-sex marriage licenses as of today.

I just wanted to tell you a few things because I think that they are things that might need clearing up. And here they are:

Mostly I want to tell you that the bible folk are full of it (and I think we both know precisely what “it” is). I am married. My marriage was in a state yesterday before you could get married. My marriage is in that same state today, now that the opportunity is available to you to have that same relationship. I don’t believe that your right to be married means that my right to be married is changed in any way.

Also, please know that there are straight people who are just fine with you being married. Do not let those horrid smallminded hateful people get you down-I know you’re used to it, but please forget about them. This is a bigger issue than they will ever understand. They are probably the same folks who screamed bloody murder when black people were allowed to drink from the same water fountains or go to the same schools or even (gasp!) marry white people.

However, there are some things I will never understand. I wish I could explain them to you, but I just don’t think I can. I don’t understand how people can say the things to you that they do. I don’t understand how you can be looked down on for somehow having a less legitimate partner in life or in raising a family. And I most sincerely don’t understand how you can be summarily dismissed as a secondclass citizen for wanting the same things that other people already have. Not just a wedding, but all of the things that such a wedding entails. Tax things and medical things and legal things and all the other sorts of things that are apparently my right but your endless legal battle.

I am sorry that you are treated like this. I am sorry that there are people in the world who think that who you go home to at night is their business. And most of all I am sorry that there is no way that I can do anything to keep those people from being hurtful. I will do what I can for you, but I cannot make all of them stop. I will take flowers to the courthouse and stand witness for people if they need me to, and I will sign petitions and call senators and donate money. I want to do more, but that’s all that is within my power. If you have any ideas on this, I would appreciate them.

Thank you for reading this. I hope that the sentiments of one person can give you at least a tiny bit of solace in this uncertain time.

Sincerely,
-Verso

I would not read books at all
Until the day that fateful fall
When I received The Cat In The Hat
And that, they say, was the end of that!
New words! New pictures! Things One and Two!
I could not resist, and neither could you.

ABC Book, Green Eggs And Ham
Horton and Sneetches and that Sam I Am
I loved them all, and I couldn’t stop!
The Lorax too, and Hop On Pop
I read each one and read some more
Who says kids books are a bore?

Why am I writing rhymes, you say?
A century ago today
Ted Geisel, (as he used to be)
Was born, and so now you see
Why I wrote this little rhyme
For a great author of our time.

(yeah, it’s not all that good or anything, but I had to do something. look around, I’m sure someone did much better at it than I did. And it’s true, 100 years ago today Dr Seuss was born.)

here’s some quizzy stuff and some copy-pastey nonsense for you:

A little of column A, a little of column B:

Postatem obscuri lateris nescitis.
“You do not know the power of the Dark
Side.” There are two possibilities: you
are a Star Wars geek, or you are unreasoningly
scary.

Which Weird Latin Phrase Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla